#21

21. I like to spend time alone now.

So, if you are a faithful follower, you'll know that upon my arrival to Honduras, I had quite a few obstacles. I had to stay in the Houston airport for like two days and then when I finally got here, I was sick for about three and had to stay locked up in a house all by myself. I almost lost it. I seriously almost did! Dorm life was so great for me in school because if my roommate wasn't home or if there was absolutely no one on my wing, I could choose from seven other wings and if that didn't work I could wander the whole campus for company. I never had to be lonely! So, that first week was very difficult for me to be alone for so long.

Now here I am in the last week of my year, and I am once again alone. Rachel and Julia left on Saturday (ish), Kirsty and Jacki left on Sunday, and Sarah left super early Wednesday morning. I spent all of Monday just hanging out and relaxing with Sarah, Tuesday I worked at the school for 6 hours organizing all the extra school materials the other girls left me (it was like Christmas! Paper clips, white boards, stickers, pencils and pens!!), and then came home and cleaned the house for a little bit. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday I worked at the school all day/went to graduation. And now Saturday and Sunday. Yesterday I spent all day and part of the night cleaning and organizing the house. I don't think I'm going to live in this house next year so I'm packing up all my stuff to store at the comedor. I had round-the-clock trash burning yesterday and brought all my laundry down to be cleaned. I put all the baking materials that will keep for 6 weeks in tupperware containers so that the 3 mice that have decided to inhabit our house will have no access to it. The only thing left for today is to clean all the dishes and clean out the fridge.

But anyway, back to why I like being alone now. I still don't really love it. But I'm content. I can spend the whole day by myself working on something and feel productive. There were a couple times during the year where I wished I actually had a place to go and be alone- not because of the girls necessarily, but just because our way of living dictated that we spend every second together and I realized that there were times where I didn't need that. That it would have been nice to have a Starbucks to go to by myself and just read. I'm very curious to see how I adjust to having lots of people to see again. When I really can choose if I want to be alone or go out. Or to even be in big groups of people where everyone can understand everyone. I'm not really used to that. My world of people that understand me here has become so small (like smaller than my family! haha) that I think it will be a big shock to come back and realize that everyone can understand my conversation, or that I can go to church and have a conversation with anyone, or that I can go to a restaurant with a big group of friends. That I can go to a store or a library or the gas station and not have to practice the conversation I'm going to have with the person at the register in my head! Ah.... it will be different, but I am still excited to be home and see everyone. Until then, I have my internet (sometimes :)), some hot water on to boil for tea or hot chocolate (or both!), the beautiful, delicious Honduran outdoors, and a whole sink of dishes waiting for me! Pretty sweet huh? :)